Wednesday, August 1, 2012

A Thousand Goodbyes

July 30
Monday

Bill and I went to breakfast in Slade's Corners, then to a meat locker where I bought some brats Bill suggested I try. Back at his place I visited with he and Dorothy until just after ten o'clock.

Leaving is harder each time. I see the age on their faces and in their steps. I know that one day soon I may not be able to see them anymore. I am grateful to God that we have a good relationship--but I will be saddened when they die.

We stopped by Kathy's where we talked and had a late lunch before heading south. Brandon was there with us. He showed me pictures of his life at the park. There he was holding baby gators and grownup snakes--even dressed as a scary clown for the Halloween "Haunted Woods" event. Art stopped by during his lunch hour to say "Hi."

It wasn't so easy to leave there either.

Depressed, I ate like a hog all the way home. All stuff that was bad for me: the donuts, chocolate covered raisins, White Castle jalapeno cheese burgers. More still when I got home. No self-control. Very shaming.

Highway 30 is a long stretch of nothing. It hadn't bored me on the way too Wisconsin, but it nagged me all the way home.

At home I tried to read, couldn't; tried to watch television, couldn't; tried to write, couldn't. What did I do? Sulked and played Mah Jong on the computer. Felt like I was on a road to nowhere.



Straight rusting rails
weeds in between cross ties--
a thousand goodbyes. 




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